Yaldi 2 - Cliche Alert

Jesus H Christ.

An utterly murderous week. And an utterly brilliant week. So anyone still reading this will forgive me the use of a tired old cliche - an emotional rollercoaster.

Today I passed my second crit. University tutor sitting in on my lesson, watching my every move; dissecting my lesson plan; watching each and every pupil for signs of disengagement not being picked up on by yours truly. My third year class were reasonably well engaged for the first three quarters of the lesson - and bored titless for the last 10 minutes - so I managed to pass the crit on the bigger part of the lesson. Parallel resistors ? It kinda bores me titless too.

Am I happy ? Well, yes, but not for passing the crit. Yesterday I took a second year class through a chemistry lesson on producing some compounds - specifically iron chloride and copper chloride. A class that - one week previously - had brought me to my knees and made me question my entire future, had given me my most enjoyable lesson so far. Two-way questioning, experimental work, laughs, and successful learning. Pikey 13/14 year olds engaging in chemistry and demonstrating clearly that they had enjoyed my lesson - 55 minutes of life-affirming activity that sent me home with the biggest grin I've ever had with my clothes on.

So in the space of a week, careerwise I've been the most unsettled I've ever been - and I've been the most exhilarated I've ever been.

In "Parenthood" one of Steve Martin's downward-spiral films (which probably started with the last 10 minutes of Planes, Trains & Automobiles) his mother-in-law describes her fondness for a particular type of fairground ride - some rollercoaster or other - in preference to the more sedate type of ride.

It feels like I'm currently on Sheikra - the world's mentalest rollercoaster.

More Mental

This teaching placement is proving a toughie. The school I'm in is very different from my last experience - different kids, different staff. And I have a more challenging timetable with more challenging classes.

As a new teacher with a new class, it seems to be the case that you get a couple of lessons "on the house" before boundaries start to get explored, buttons start to get pressed and (with kids who are a bit more streetwise) it becomes extremely difficult to maintain a calm exterior.

However, I'm learning that good discipline is a real art and seldom involves shouting your head off. Time and again I see really good teachers with pupils outside classes talking calmly and clearly explaining the rules that have been broken. Pupils who are treated this way tend to respond quite reflectively and are able to accept that they have made a mistake.

Remarkable really, when you consider that many of these kids start their day with no breakfast and a long detour walk to school to avoid streets where they might get a kicking.

The profile of classes is also a huge change. S1 and S2 classes with 20 kids sometimes doped up on aspartame, sometimes falling asleep at their desks (and sometimes of course wanting to be entertained and taught stuff). But the converse is S5 and S6 classes of half a dozen really motivated pupils. This mix is providing me with a huge amount of learning and experience, but sadly it's a return to 4am waking, 13 hour days and a permanent knot in the stomach the size of a basketball.

Don't try this at home.

Life's Most Important Lesson

Four weeks into the New Year and we're standing on the brink of another teaching practice. Anyone still reading this may remember I had a bit of a health disaster in my first teaching practice - prolapsing a disc and missing nearly two weeks of valuable teaching time.

This time round I'm fully fit and hopefully facing a clear run that'll take me to mid-March and the promise of some Spring weather.

The school for this placement is different in many ways to my last one - it's in Glasgow and has more by way of social challenges for its pupils. However, having visited it last week for a day I'm really looking forward to my time there. The pupils were by and large well behaved and keen to learn and the building itself is brighter and newer than my other school.

My targets for this term (to misquote Blair and his band of hobgoblins) consist of Assessment, Assessment and Assessment. No, no written tests and exams (usually referred to as Summative Assessment) but Formative Assessment which aims to provide much more by way of regular feedback to pupils and encouragement to become actively involved in their own learning. It's about sharing learning intentions at the start of each lesson, effective questioning to explore and gauge understanding, qualitative feedback upon task completion (fewer ticks in red pen and more comments) and a properly planned strategy to demonstrate successful learning at the end of the lesson.

Research shows that such an approach dramatically increases pupil attainment - well who'da thunk it ?

Anyways, my decision to take a madcap career jump was brought into sharp focus this week when I received the news that an old work chum died suddenly from a heart attack. John had plans to do other stuff in a few short years time when his pension kicked in - it's desperately sad that he's not going to get the chance.

Learning time people: if you've something you really want to do, do it soon.

Taking (And Making) Stock

So I finally "get to Christmas".

The quotes are important here: apparently if you manage to "get to Christmas" the chances of failing or dropping out reduce to near-zero. Each year a considerable number of PGDE students run screaming for the Exit door either during their two-week school induction block (no actual teaching required) or during their six-week teaching placement block (loads of actual teaching required). They either realise that they simply can't do it, or make the decision that standing in front of 20-30 teenagers simply isn't something that they enjoy.

"Getting to Christmas" is predicated on passing both your crit and being marked as Satisfactory in your Report From School. Having achieved the former last week, on Friday I achieved the latter. I'm proud of this - having only managed to teach for half of the placement due to my duff back.

Six weeks ago I wrote that by this date I would know whether or not I was capable of doing this, and whether or not I enjoy it. The facts would seem to verify that I am indeed capable of the first. However the answer to the second is more complex.

I really (like, really) enjoy being in front of a class and the kids seem to at least tolerate me. There's no doubt that you get an enormous buzz from seeing children learn as a result of what you are doing.

However - and I think this is a factor of student life rather than teaching life - it's hard not being properly part of a team. I miss my old work chums and I miss the social aspect of shared goals. Realistically, it's going to be at least a year or two until I experience that again.

Still. Teaching ? Love it. And I can do it.

And, er, the three weeks I now have to put my feet up, reel off a 3,500 word essay and drink too much beer would seem to be at least some compensation for the professional isolation. With Christmas dinner on my to-do list for this year, I'll also be spending the next week prepping for fifteen extended-family mouths, starting with a pot of soup the size of Meadowbank pool.

Now that I've taken stock, time to make some too.

Yaldi

Apparently, when the kids of today get something good happening or get a good piece of news, the accepted reflex response is "yaldi".

Today I passed my crit (see blogs passim). Yaldi.

Eighteen smiley twelve years olds beavering away frantically with frictionless ramps, light gates, digital timers and four-wheeled bogeys, trying to gather some results to see how the final speed of said bogey varies with its starting height.

In twenty minutes flat. In front of my tutor.

Try planning that, multi-million pound IT delivery dudes !

Anyways I even managed to get a "merit" in one of the four categories ("Professional Teaching Abilities") which apparently is a reasonable achievement for a first crit. My class were wee gems and the sweat I expended until late last night developing a spreadsheet that allowed them to enter their raw data and automatatically produce the nice curve graph for this experiment (feel free to prove it on the Comments page) paid off handsomely. A tableau of nine minigraphs all with the same curve displayed proudly on the Promethean board for all to see. Mission accomplished.

Half an hour of debrief - along with the review of the official report form - and a cuppa with said tutor, and it was on to my next lesson. No time to bask. No time go for a celebratory beer. No time for an extended lunch.

Next up, amongst other things, I have series and parallel circuits to cover with younger pupils, amplitude modulation to cover with some standard graders, and the potentially deep embarrassment of starting AC circuit theory with my Higher class. I am rapidly finding out that teaching your own area of academic "expertise" is actually the hardest thing to do.

However I now have an official document that says I am capable of doing this.

Yaldi.

Watch Your Back

Back in the saddle and teaching for real (instead of all that nambypamby "observing and cooperative teaching" flimflam).

The back is pain-free and my leg is only occasionally making me sit down. Listen up class - if you ever put a "tweak" in your back, pay heed to these learning outcomes: don't fanny about with it, get it seen to, rest it for a couple of days. A disc-prolapse is the most depressing pain I've ever experienced.

Anyways, student teaching is a complete feckin' nightmare. You are expected to really teach. This means producing between two and four lesson plans for every day of the working week and - although I knew this before I started - the reality is still like a punch on the nose.

Following every lesson, you get your feedback which essentially consists of being told what you're not doing right. Most of the "correct" alternatives can only seemingly be gained with experience - so essentially I am getting a near-constant stream of criticism for being inexperienced.

So loads of work, much of it being pulled apart. Twelve to thirteen hour days. Waking at 5am and not getting back to sleep. Learning a lot, but feeling persistently stupid. Did you know that sound is quicker these days ? Apparently it's not 330m/s any more, it's now 340m/s. And even when I'm on "home-turf" (electricity) my teaching is too complex. Don't (ever) try to teach internal resistance as being essentially a voltage divider circuit. And don't (ever) talk about energy if you're teaching about forces. Current is always big-I never little-i. Never use upper case on the board. And don't write with a red marker on a whiteboard. Don't go too fast. Don't go too slow. Share your learning outcomes. Check your success criteria.

(My teacher colleagues are actually excellent to work with - knowledgable, sympathetic and professional. Direct with feedback - which is what I asked for).

However, being in on-line touch with my fellow students is saving my sanity as it seems to be a common thread. At least I haven't burst into tears on the morning train, and I have yet to fail a crit (OK, so I've yet to sit one but we'll gloss over that), I have yet to have any pupils swearing at me or make lewd comments about my breasts. I have also yet to seriously question my being here. Yet.

However. Ouch. It hurts.

A Bit Of A Nerve

I can't teach.

Having finally got off the ground this week with a couple of "real" lessons, having subsequently been given some good feedback (along with the mandatory Areas For Improvement), the tweak I put in my lower back last week has finally reached out and grabbed the main nerve bundle serving my left leg.

The pain in my leg is feckin' terrible, primarily when I am standing or walking: two of the main physical activities required of a teacher. This has stopped my teaching in its tracks.

Consultations with both my GP and my local Chiropracter have resulted in a diagnosis of a disc prolapse along with a course of diclofenac and amitriptyline. I am sore, worried and grumpy - not least because I have a "crit" in a couple of weeks time and I'm going to be severely limited as to the amount of teaching practice I can actually complete.

The past couple of days have seen me laid up at home, lying on the sofa doing lesson plans and watching old DVD's on my new upscaling DVD player (try watching Bladerunner on a decent HD telly - top notch).

However, I'm now left with a bit of a dilemma. I can haul my ass back to school as soon as possible (in order to get as much experience as I can) and maybe make it worse; or take more time off in order to fully recover but get heehaw teaching practice before my crit.

The nightmare scenario is of course that I can't complete this placement at all and fail to graduate this year.

Oh, arse.